I should have known something was up when she placed her laptop on the couch and patted the cushion. That’s a move normally indicating a surprise grooming session or a desperate plea for company while she watches yet another Law & Order: SVU marathon. Then I heard it. “Mew! Mew! Mew!”
Hi, I’m Skippy. A cat. And my human subjected me to 80 minutes of CatVideoFest 2020.
Me-wow, people record a lot of cat videos. I thought I had it bad being recorded whenever I fetch a toy like a dog. But come on, that’s talent! Meanwhile, these folks are recording cats simply kicking their hind legs, jumping on top of people doing yoga, wait, standing on someone’s crotch?! Cat, get ahold of yourself! Have some self-respect!
(Wait, why is my human laughing?)
Some of these cats clearly have issues. A cat who enjoys taking a bath? Don’t even get me started on the long clip of that weird cat with its tongue hanging out. And lolz, there’s a cat walking on a leash. Did no one tell that thing if it drops to the ground and plays dead, their human will just give up?
Do people really gather around a big room and watch this stuff? It’s just clip after clip of cats doing dumb stuff. I gave up and left the room before it ended, but as I turned the corner, I could hear the muffled laughs and whimpers of my owner still watching.
Humans are weird. I’m going back to bed.
CatVideoFest 2020. Fri., Feb. 28-Sun., March 8. The Rangos Giant Cinema at Carnegie Science Center. 1 Allegheny Ave., North Side. $7.95-9.95. carnegiesciencecenter.org
Also, Fri., Feb. 28-Thu., March 5. Row House Cinema. 4115 Butler St., Lawrenceville. rowhousecinema.com