Fast and Furious 6 | Film | Pittsburgh | Pittsburgh City Paper

Fast and Furious 6

Justin Lin's actioner has all the pumped-up dudes and souped-up cars fans want

Tyrese Gibson is momentarily carless.
Tyrese Gibson is momentarily carless.

Justin Lin's Fast and Furious 6 is everything fans of the franchise want: good-looking people; souped-up cars; car chases; car wrecks; chick fights; guy fights; clutch-poppin' and downshifting; exotic locales; villains with cheesy facial hair; a plot that makes so little sense that it can be instantly disregarded; and the promise of Fast and Furious 7 (a.k.a. this shit ain't over, bro).

All the gang is back — including the formerly dead Letty (Michelle Rodriguez) — plus MMA star Gina Carano and Luke Evans as the bad guy who spices up his street-racing with international terror plots. Most of the story occurs in London (with a quick jaunt to Cali for the obligatory Mexican-cartel cameo), or on Spanish highways. 

When not bogged down in existential discussions — at its heart, this film is about the restoration of the family institution — Lin moves things along with his patented flash-and-crash. It's all about the action, and if the nighttime streets are slick with rain and reflecting the artful lighting, so much the better. At more than two hours, this bloated outing is too long, but it delivers the critical numbers.

Number of baldies: 11 — 10 action dudes, plus one baby

Times our heroes say "Ride or die": 2

Other life codes: "Precision" (the villain), "Family" (heroes), "Suspended Disbelief" (audience)

Estimated number of other cars in central London during chases and races: 12

Jumps from speeding vehicles: 10

Times audience gasped at the audacity of a stunt move: 3

Likelihood of such stunts being successful using real-world physics: 0

Estimated number of wrecked cars (includes direct hits, collateral spin-outs, robotic overrides and being crushed by a tank): 10,000

Injuries (car-related): 0

Injuries (gun-related): 1

Bullets removed from broken hearts: 1

Scenes featuring the "Tokyo drift": 1

Estimated length of airport runway on which the final showdown involving a Russian transport jet occurs: 20-30 miles

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