Category: Best goat found tied to a mailbox
Winner: The goat found in Polish Hill
Reason: Come on!
Category: Best political party
Reason: Got on ballot more than Republicans.
Category: Best event of the year
Winner: The Furry convention
Reason: Do we really have to explain?
Category: Best exercise of civil liberties
Winner: End War Fast
Reason: Well organized, eye on the prize and cooperated with non-anarchy oriented groups.
Category: Best dog
Winner: Brownie, Point Breeze
Reason: God knows she's not smart, but she's sweet.
Category: Best new green business
Winner: Fossil Free Fuels
Reason: They are committed to something really interesting, and have brought a spark not only to Braddock but all of Pittsburgh.
Category: Best place to make out
Winner: Photo Booth at the Warhol
Reason: How could you resist? Photos are only $3, and you've got make-out memories for a lifetime!
Category: Best community center
Winner: Kingsley Center
Reason: Fabulous facility, well run and reasonable membership.
Category: Best river to drown in
Winner: Ohio River
Reason: The massive amounts of filth and debris floating toward us from Ohio [sic].
Category: Best non-chosen idea
Winner: Trolley to Oakland
Reason: This would improve the economy, reduce traffic, fix a lot of problems. That's why we won't do it.
Category: Best non-profit organization
Winner: Thomas Merton Center
Reason: The place needs some love right now, and they've helped other nonprofits carry on for a long time.
Category: Best place to be inspired
Winner: Phipps Conservatory
Reason: Newly remodeled space, beautiful plants from all over the world, incredible exhibits like Dale Chihuly.
Category: Best spot to get it on in public
Winner: Flagstaff Hill
Reason: Trees for cover, Phipps for romantic inspiration, proximity to drugstores for condoms, lube and emergency contraception.
Category: Best place to fly a kite
Winner: Flagstaff Hill
Reason: Open space with great wind and tons of people to talk to and have fun.
Category: Best waste of 15 years
Winner: Pittsburgh Pirates
Reason: Near-record level of futility.
Category: Best Christian rock band
Winner: Invincible Spirit
Reason: They bring teenagers closer to Christ in this crazy world of ours.
Category: Best reason to build a hockey arena
Winner: Mario says so
Reason: The whole thing is just ridiculous.
Category: Best readers' poll that has the most references to alcohol
Winner: City Paper
Reason: Not all of your readers are 20-something and drunk.