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21 Best hookup sites and sex apps for adult dating in 2021

Sometimes hooking up with a hot date is a better option than staying at home and binge watching Netflix. One-night stands aren't for everyone, but casual sex is a fun pastime for many open-minded people.

Still, meeting people at the local bar seems lame (and expensive), so what hookup apps and dating websites actually work?

Our research team and I personally found many sites and apps that let helped me skip all the awkward dinner and drama and just fast-forward to the great sex. From a friend with benefits to no-strings-attached affairs, here are the best hookup sites in 2021.


Let's get to it!

Best Places to Find Hookups Online

Best Hookup Sites

  1. Adult Friend Finder - Best hookup site overall
  2. Reddit DirtyR4R - 100% free sex personals
  3. Plenty of Fish - Classic hookup site
  4. AshleyMadison - Married sex dating
  5. OkCupid - Great for college students
  6. Seeking - Sugar daddies & sugar babies
  7. Alt.com - Many different fetishes

Best Hookup Apps

  1. Bumble - Best hookup app overall
  2. Pure App - Best discreet hookup app
  3. 3Fun - Best threesome finder app
  4. Feeld - Best polyamorous app
  5. Grindr - Top hookup app for gay men

Special Mentions

  1. Hinge - Best for long-term relationships
  2. Tinder - Best for crazy dating stories
  3. HER - Ladies looking for a hookup with women
  4. Whiplr - Best find a partner into BDSM
  5. Happn - Most like Craigslist activities

Popular Hookup Sites and Apps Reviewed

Before we look at the top 10, here are the top 3 hookup platforms overall.

1. Adult Friend Finder - Best Hookup Site

Pros
  • Variety of features, like groups and threesomes
  • Niche searches & forums
  • Local search or filtered search
Cons
  • 80% males, 20% females
  • Some fake profiles

Adult Friend Finder has been matching horny people together for well over 20 years and has adapted to the changing landscape of sexuality and technology. Adult Friend Finder offers everything from local matches, to live chat, fetish forums, and even live web cameras.

It's got it all!

But what makes it particularly interesting is its offering of threesomes, groups, and events. Adult Friend Finder is available all over the world and has a membership count of nearly 100 million. If you’re going for kink instead of romance, AFF won’t disappoint.

2. Bumble - Best Hookup App

Pros
  • Women make the first move
  • Use the app for dating, friendship, or networking
  • Free chat if there’s a mutual swipe
Cons
  • Some features require premium membership

Bumble pioneers a concept that many women will find comforting. You make the first move! That means you don’t have to talk to the guys you don’t like. When there is a match, you have 24 hours to accept or reject a conversation with him.

No more inbox full of d*ck pics!


Bumble is the only major site to use this concept and it’s no coincidence that there's a pretty 50-50 female to male ratio. In case you didn't know, most hookup and dating sites have MUCH MORE male users than female users, so this hookup app for women is killing it.

3. DirtyR4R - Best 100% Free Sex Personals

Pros
  • No membership, completely free!
  • More of a free version, personal ads forum
  • LGBT-friendly
Cons
  • Mainly available in big cities
  • No real filtering process
  • Not much moderation

If hooking up is not worth paying for, why not use Reddit? This particular Reddit forum is one of the most popular dating sites online and has over 400K members.

It’s upfront all right, with offers of sex from a variety of genders. It’s 100% free and very to-the-point about what the poster wants in terms of limits and needs, which is handy.

Runner Ups for Best Hookup Sites

These hookup and adult dating sites look better on a PC than a mobile device, but they still get the job done for finding casual sex matches.

Here are the standouts!

4. Plenty of Fish - Classic Hookup Site

Pros
  • Local matches in your area
  • Fun “Chemistry Predictor” feature
  • Profile search filters
Cons
  • Some fake profiles
  • Free membership seems limited

Plenty of Fish has been around since 2003, amassing a dedicated user base in that time. The site offers matching, local swiping, and manual profile searches, though you can only chat if you have a mutual match.

It’s the classic hookup site, and easy to use even for newcomers.

You can pay a membership fee to unlock all chat features. Some people use POF for more serious online dating, but you can find plenty of people looking for local hookups too!

5. AshleyMadison - Best for Married Sex Dating

Pros
  • Cheating/affairs are mutual here
  • Lots of guys not wanting commitments
  • Masks and blur options to protect photos
Cons
  • The theme is not everyone’s cup of tea

If you’re married and looking, you’re not going to feel welcomed at just any online dating site. But that’s why Ashley Madison works — it appeals to married people looking to have an affair, whether that's ethical or not.


Ashley Madison is not for all tastes, but if you’re in that situation, there’s no better site to use that protects your reputation. Stay anonymous and even blur your face in photos with their built-in features.

We don't condone cheating, but the website is there for that purpose and remains incredibly popular.

6. OKCupid - Best for College Students

Pros
  • Detailed questionnaire for compatibility
  • Younger demographics
  • LGBTQ and poly-friendly
Cons
  • Questionnaire is LONG
  • Older demographics might feel out of place

OkCupid has a younger demographic and is much more LGBTQ-friendly than the average dating app, with over 20 sexual orientations, 12 genders, and hookup, short-term, or long-term affair options.

You can really tailor-make your dating app experience!

Best of all, OkCupid has a questionnaire to help bring out your values for more efficient matching. Multiple-choice questions ask for your opinions on politics, religion, sports, hobbies, drugs, love, and sex.

You know, nothing controversial.

7. Seeking - Best for Rich Guys & Sugar Daddies

Pros
  • Sugar daddy & sugar baby platform
  • Verified millionaire profiles
  • Free for women
Cons
  • If you’re not into sugar dating, you won’t enjoy it at all

Seeking.com appeals to rich guys (a.k.a sugar daddies) and “sugar babies,” who are usually college-age women looking to be spoiled by rich men.

But whereas other sites encourage age difference-dating just for fun, Seeking is all about the money. It’s about spoiling someone with fancy dinners, lots of gifts, and buying them stuff from their Amazon wishlist.

The site also encourages “sugar mamas” looking for hot younger sugar baby men, so that's nice too.

8. Alt.com - Best for Fetishes

Pros
  • Balanced female/male ratio
  • Poly and LGBTQ people welcome
  • Fetish matching makes casual sex easy
Cons
  • Limited free preview

Alt.com is the naughty dating site of the bunch, geared towards BDSM, kink, and other (legal) taboos that many find exciting. Let’s face it, some people want just sex, and some people want all the unique foreplay and after-play that makes it even better.

Count me in!

Alt.com lets you find your niche and fetish partner, no matter how obscure your shared passion. Whether you like the Fifty Shades bondage stuff or simple roleplay fantasies, you'll find it all on this casual dating app.

Best Hookup Dating Apps for Mobile Devices Only

Want to move your profile search into a chat room and to IRL as soon as possible? Here are the best apps for the job.

1. Pure App - Best Discreet Hookup App

Pros
  • Great hookup app for women
  • Short ad & photo posted for only 24 hours
  • Mask yourself if necessary
Cons
  • Hard to turn into a friend with benefits situation

Pure App is the Ashley Madison of apps, offering “shameless” anonymous hookups. All you need is a photo, a brief profile, and a location for nearby matching.

Users can video chat and wear a “virtual mask” for privacy. The app only hosts ads for 24 hours and then they disappear, guaranteeing no long-term searchability.

2. 3Fun - Best Threesome Finder App

Pros
  • LGBTQ friendly
  • Threesome & poly-friendly
  • Photo verification feature
  • 2 million active users
Cons
  • High membership price
  • Some reports of dead profiles

3Fun is an app designed for swingers, single “unicorns,” and other non-monogamous lovers searching for hookups. With about 2 million members, it’s a growing community and one that welcomes LGBTQ members.

I mean, who hasn't dreamt about a threesome at some point?

3Fun offers an optional photo verification, as well as private albums for your favorite friends. You can chat for free with mutual matches and arrange a threesome or swapping date locally.

3. Feeld - Best Polyamorous App

Pros
  • Threesomes, poly, & alternative lifestyles
  • Incognito surfing
  • 20+ genders & preferences
Cons
  • Fairly small user base (new app)

Feeld offers to match couples up with other couples or singles nearby, making it ideal for threesomes. The app site speaks of ethical non-monogamy so while cheating is not encouraged, there are many other options to choose from.

That's great to see!

Couples can join as one profile, or you can choose from over 20 preferences and genders. Feeld is inclusive and best of all, private and discreet with an incognito searching mode.

4. Grindr - Best Gay or Lesbian Date Finder

Pros
  • Unlimited scrolling for paid members
  • See gay men closest to your location
  • Browse incognito
  • Unsend messages (in case you say too much!)
Cons
  • Everyone has a “scary Grindr” story

Grindr is actually becoming more competitive with Tinder lately because it’s not only for gay men, but now also welcomes lesbian, bisexual, trans, and queer people looking for a date or hookup.

The famous gay hookup app offers anonymity and a mostly unfiltered search, with the grid-based geolocation UI showing you users closest to your physical location.

Hooking up has never been so easy!

You can chat for free with users, trade photos, and share interests. But mostly, as everyone seems to agree, this is about random sex and not much in the way of serious bonding. There's also a fair amount of negative interactions, so watch out.

Honorable Mention Hookup Sites

These casual dating and hookup sites didn't make the cut, but they're still widely used and very popular with some users!

Hinge - Best for Serious Relationships

Hinge is a hookup up “and more” since it encourages its users to seek out emotional connection and even long-term relationships.

Tinder - Best for Crazy Dating Stories

You might meet a great guy and have a great night in bed ... or you might meet someone not-so-great and have a really bad date story for the ages.

HER - Top Lesbian Dating App

Her is a lesbian, bisexual, and queer app highlighting the LGBTQ community. In particular, this dating app has a user base of mostly cisgender and transgender women.

Whiplr - Best to Find a Partner in BDSM (App)

Whiplr offers kink matching, location matching, member videos, and even BDSM community events. It also has a bit of a funny name, which is cool.

Happn - Most Like Craigslist Activities

Happn is a nice app to have if you spotted someone you wanted to talk to, but never got the chance. It's designed for talking to "people you crossed paths with". Look them up on Happn to see if they remembered you!

The Modern Woman’s Hookup Guide

Too many guys are hung up on the idea that women only want “serious relationships,” when the fact of the matter is, sometimes we just want to have fun.

It's just like Cyndi Lauper said.

That’s why we’re going to talk about how to have an awesome bedroom affair, and not a night of regret and awkwardness — which frankly, is what Tinder brings me most of the time.

Let’s talk about safety, sanity, and consent.

5 Tips On How to Have a One-Night Stand Safely

Here are a few tips for women looking for safe, fun local hookups!

  • PANDEMIC PRECAUTIONS - To avoid spreading coronavirus, it’s a good idea to make sure both you and your potential hookup have been fully vaccinated for Covid-19 before meeting.
  • AVOID REAL NAMES - Consider not telling the guy your full name or real name, especially if you don’t want to see him again. If you want this to be a one-night thing, keep details about your personal life to a minimum.
  • MEET IN PUBLIC - Never meet him in a private place until you trust him and he’s provided evidence of his sanity and basic human decency. There’s nothing wrong with meeting a hookup partner in a public place first and having a conversation.
  • FEEL THE VIBES - If there are any red flags or even a bad psychic vibe coming your way, don’t question it. A normal and safe guy will be more than happy to earn your approval and have a good night on your terms — not just his.
  • TELL A FRIEND - For that matter, always tell a trusted friend or family where you’re going and who you’re going to meet. Sending a friend the guy’s phone number or even his picture and profile is the smart thing to do.
  • USE PROTECTION - Be sure to bring your own protection, assuming you don't plan on babies or STDs any time soon. Also, consider a mace spray or something similar — just in case.

What Mistakes Should I Avoid (That Everyone Still Makes!)

First of all, try to enjoy the experience, rather than worrying about what he thinks of you or if you’re doing it right. If he didn’t think you’re attractive, he wouldn’t have asked you out.

Makes sense, right?

Second, try to avoid coming “unprepared.” That means bringing a change of underwear (and maybe a new set of clothes!), as well as condoms and other things you may need.

While some friends of mine would say "never even mess with a guy who doesn’t bring condoms," some women are OK bringing their own protection.

However, if a guy insists you “don’t need it,” he’s trouble.

How Does a Hookup End?

Don’t take the hookup aftermath too seriously.

There’s no need to “sneak out,” and there’s no need to treat the affair like the start of a beautiful relationship. In fact, a lot of guys will be relieved if you keep things friendly and sort of “professional” as you say your goodbyes.

The first date is all about having fun. One text would suffice to show him that you had a good time, nothing more.

FAQs on Hookup Sites

If you still have questions, we have a few answers from the women who have been there, seen plenty, and conquered much.

Should we go to his place, my place, or a hotel?

If you’ve known the guy for a while and trust him, you might be more comfortable in your own bed or his. However, if he’s little more than a handsome stranger, a neutral place like a hotel is probably best.

Always, always, bring your own method of transportation — even if he’s the most trustworthy guy in the world. You ALWAYS need an option for getting out of there in a flash, just in case.

That could be an uber, your car, a bus ... whatever.

If both of you don’t want any attachment or contact outside of the affair then getting a hotel room would be a safe compromise. This is usually the best option as neither of you has a personal attachment to the space.

How do we talk about sex?

Don’t feel shy about discussing the most important element of the hookup! Make sure you tell him as early as you decide to fool around:

  • Your hard limits (Never will I ever ...)
  • Your soft limits (Please go slow …)
  • The kind of sex you enjoy (Give plenty of details!)

It’s also very cool for you to get his wish list and limits, so you’ll be on the same page!

No, the sex won’t be perfect. But it’s going to be much better and less awkward if you take the time to communicate before, during, and after.

Respect each other and have fun!

What if I like him — can I see him again or is that weird?

Not at all! Many friends-with-benefits arrangements start off as one-night stands, and if things go well, you can keep him on “speed dial” for a future sex date.

You might even end up in a long-term relationship ... who knows!

Just be aware it’s kind of hard to turn a friend with benefits relationship into a serious boyfriend/girlfriend thing. As long as you’re both honest about what you want from the affair, and what you don’t want, it’s going to be a lot of fun for the both of you.

So, Which Is The Best Hookup Site?

Personally speaking, I can tell you that Bumble is a great hookup app for women due to its 50-50 female to male ratio and the fact that it gives women the power to start or end conversations.

Finally!

Similarly, Adult Friend Finder has over 100 million members in its user base and everyone is there for the same thing — no strings attached casual encounters, they even have cam sites! There's no pretense with AFF, which is nice.

So, whichever hookup site or casual dating app you decide to try, we hope you find the right pick for your needs. Good luck!

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