This Just In: May 21 - 28 | This Just In | Pittsburgh | Pittsburgh City Paper

This Just In: May 21 - 28

Baby Got Less Back

Summary: The final installment of a series depicting the weight-loss odyssey of four local teams, à la The Biggest Loser. Reporter: Jennifer Abney, WPXI Channel 11 Airtime: 1 minute, 35 seconds on May 13 Visuals: * A four-way, split screen showing the formidable weight-loss teams marching to the scale for a final weigh-in. * Campy snapshots of the teams, some of them shown stuffing their faces, some in their unmentionables. Highlights: * When Abney does her best anchorbot impersonation (or is it real?): "Every Friday, four teams weighed in at the Channel 11 studios. They named themselves. ... It was a tough process for all 16 people, and took a lot of determination." * When Abney explains, "Here's how they did it. The Big Booty Crew, a group of women who work together in Carnegie, finished in fourth place, losing a total of 21 pounds." * When a member of The BBC speaks on behalf of the group, "Slowly, but surely, we're losing weight -- so that's what matters." * When Abney continues, "The Flab Four, a group of teachers from Ellwood City, set out to inspire their students. They dropped 61 pounds and definitely accomplished their goal." * When she adds, "The Double Takes all work right here in Pittsburgh, and they were determined to win." * When a female member of the team confesses, "I really missed out on getting to eat the typical Easter chocolate. But this is so worth it, so worth it." * When Abney reports, "Even though they came in second, they lost a total of 69-and-a-half pounds. That's an amazing 9.3 percent of their starting weight." * When Abney advances, "And finally, the big winners: The Phat Squad started the challenge in first place and never gave up their lead. This group of pastors and church volunteers from Latrobe dropped 129 pounds. That's 12.4 percent of their starting weight." * When Abney concludes by noting that the three women and one man on the winning team "each received a $250 prize check for their win, but they say the weight loss is the biggest reward." What We Learned: Losers are so in! Unanswered Question: Dontcha just love (low-fat) cheesy sweeps-month stories? News Value: 0. Big deal. Pun intended. A local take on a national show, and a really boring-ass one at that. WPXI, why don't you tell us how all the TV talent stays thin instead? I'm happy for the winners -- er, losers -- but their story wasn't even sweeps-worthy. And that's saying something.