If they didn't cast high-strung contestants in reality shows, what would we talk about?

A lot of spoons clattered to the floor last week when Lisa made it to the Final Three on Top Chef. OK, so Antonia undercooked the beans (who hasn't?), but Lisa's been on the chopping block, it seems, every week. Moreover, Lisa has the worst, bad-attitude body language when up before judges' panel, and surely that pissy-ness isn't going to be rewarded.

It's obviously a battle between Richard and Stephanie, so if the third position is moot, why not let Antonia have it? Methinks that the producers know Lisa brings better TV, i.e. conflict. The second batch of cutlery you heard dropping was Lisa's unwarranted attack on Richard and Stephanie because they didn't congratulate her fast enough.

My prediction for tonight's winner: Stephanie. She's won a lot of challenges, and I'm sure the show wants to out a women in the winner's seat, finally.

Over at the Next Food Network Star, the Dallas Diva chilled while Nipa became a problem child. She was late to the first challenge, got territorial about her style of food in a group challenge, and finally, threw a full-on hissy fit during the judges' session.

She had the chutzpah to come back (or the producers made her), and the judges tossed viewers plenty of red meat to howl over when they didn't can that petulant brat. It's all groovy for this TV show, but she'd never get hired for a real show -- imagine pulling a number like that on a job interview. Still, we out in TV-land gobble up the mock outrage. Bring us more!

By the way, the food-quiz challenge stumped me badly; I only got one answer right, the one about pumpernickel bread.

For the cooking challenge, once again the teams turned out some pretty rough-looking food. Yikes, this is an audition for a TV cooking show – it may all taste divine but they've got to get those plating skills ramped up, and fast.

Over on Hell's Kitchen, the producers brought in some Real Housewives of Beverley Hills to spice up the kitchen after last week's departure of Manic Matt. There was hope of chaos when one of the high-heeled bras minced in carrying her toy dog, but the challenge was stupid: The HK chefs had to teach these silly women how to cook a lobster and pasta dish, and the one closest to Ramsay's original recipe won.

Really, it just tested whether these women who claimed not to cook or even having used a knife before could do it. And for their troubles, they got a set of Ramsay-styled cookware to take home, where I'm sure Rosaria, or Lupe, or whomever ultimately feeds them, will be thrilled.

In the end, the "black Gordon Ramsay" was sent packing, and non-stop girls' locker-room bitch-fest between Christina, Cory and Jen continues. Curiously, still in the mix: Petrozza. Not one of them seems competent enough to run a hot-dog stand, but I guess that's Ramsay's problem.