Todd Glass needs to keep in peak physical shape. After all, the Last Comic Standing and Comedy Central veteran performs all over the country, including upcoming shows at the Pittsburgh Improv. He also appears regularly on Jimmy Kimmel Live, is working on two television pilots, including Todd Glass Saves America, and has a DVD in the works. Thus this interview was conducted as he worked out at his local gym, in Los Angeles.
Is there anyone at the gym who annoys you?
Yeah: people who spit into the sink or water fountain and this guy who blows his nose into his hand while he's working out on the treadmill. I literally have to leave to work out somewhere else because I can't watch it.
Is that the sort of thing you'll address with Todd Glass Saves America?
Absolutely. I talk about things in my act and sometimes just mentioning them brings a little calmness to somebody. This show is doing something about it. If I had a camera, here's exactly what I'd say. "Look, sir, I'm not attacking you. I'm going to ask you a question. I understand that you might want to say, 'Screw you,' and walk away. You might even want to hit me. I'm asking you not to. With all that in mind, are you aware that blowing your nose into your hand might be a little vile to the people around you?" And we'll see what ensues.
What's the other show, Dr. Todd, about?
It's what Gary Shandling was to the late-night talk shows, but to this new breed of "Dr." shows, like Dr. Phil or Dr. Keith Ablow. I'd be "Dr. Todd," people would come on, I'd help them, and it'd all take place in the studios with the producers, writers and everything in the offices.
And you're also working on a DVD?
It's going to be called A Ridiculously Intimate Evening with Todd Glass. It's going to be at the Washington, D.C., Improv.
After a show, do people ever come up, trying to give you jokes?
Yeah, and I act like I'm deaf. And they say, "But I just saw you perform." And I say, "As soon as I get off stage I can't hear." And they say, "Can't you read lips?" "I shut my eyes and I don't wanna open them till tomorrow." And I start drooling and then vomiting.
They go, "Oh well," and then walk away. Most people get it these days that you don't want to hear a joke and even if they don't, one of their friends will go, "Don't do that."
Todd Glass Thu., March 29-Sun., April 1. The Improv, 166 E. Bridge St., The Waterfront, W. Homestead. $15. 412-462-5233 or www.symfonee.com/Improv/Pittsburgh